


Connection Oneshot-ish

by Starshaker



Series: Supernatural oneshots [3]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angel Soulbonds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-17
Updated: 2015-01-20
Packaged: 2018-03-01 22:13:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2789567
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Starshaker/pseuds/Starshaker
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Destiel, taunting, teasing and fluff. Previously published on fanfiction.net (https://www.fanfiction.net/s/8497201/1/Connection-ONESHOT)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Dean was lying across the hood of the impala after his beer had run out. Sammy had requested he leave the motel room for the evening and, well, the boy has needs. From the message he'd received, Sam had also suggested the Dean invite Cas out for the evening too. "Why don't you give Cas a call? It'd be nice to hear from him wouldn't it?"

As much as Dean enjoyed the angel's company, he was reluctant to drag the angel down; just because his brother thought he might be getting lonely and bored. Not that he was admitting to wanting Cas' company. He felt ashamed to admit he would truly want to have Cas next to him.

He stared up at the stars and imagined the stars staring back.

"They do you know," a familiar deep gravelly voice said from next to him. Dean shut his eyes

"Do what?"

"Stare down at you," Dean could see Cas in his mind's eye, looking down at him stoically.

"Nice idea to believe in,"

"What do you believe in Dean?"

"I dunno, family is a big one I guess. Grew up knowing to look out for Sammy,"

"I see," Dean looked up at the angel stood beside his car. The expression on Cas' face was one of complete sadness, and Dean couldn't help couldn't help but feel personally responsible for it.

"Trouble in paradise, Cas?"

"There was no cause for alarm when you called,"

"Wait. I didn't call Cas. It has to be like a conscious decision right? I thought about it, "Dean said defensively, "I didn't think it was worth bothering you,"

"I heard you call me," The angel turned away and Dean couldn't help but know something was troubling him.

"Cas…what do you know?"

"It is irrelevant, inconsequential,"

"Cas," Dan practically growled a warning and the angel looked very guilty. "What do you know?"

"When I dragged you from hell I was warned that there may be a more substantial bond develops between the two parties. But I took necessary precautions; I released you before the bond solidified. There was inevitably going to be some repercussions but since so much time had passed and there was no suggestion that the connection had caused any ill effects,"

"Cas, as much I enjoy it when you start babbling, can you get to the point," Cas glanced to Dean who sat leaning on his elbows. "Sit down Cas," He said, gesturing to the space on the car bonnet next to him. Cas was hesitant but at Dean's insistent gaze remained until he had slid back and leant against the windscreen next him.

"and now tell me what you know…" Dean prompted.

"I believe that the bond I initiated when I pulled you from hell included the exchange of part of our souls. However it was dormant until there was likely an exchange of another…sort,"

"When I began caring more for you the bond strengthened and you were able to call me to you more easily,"

"Aw Cas. I never knew," Dean said. The sarcasm was ultimately lost on Cas who sat awkwardly looking anywhere but at Dean; This only made Dean chuckle, lean back against the windshield further himself, and shut his eyes again.

"You said it would have been an exchange; first of souls then…"

"It's possible,"

"No, you said it was likely," Cas was silent and Dean listened for any fidget of nervousness. "Do you think its likely Cas?" Ah, there it is; the shuffle of the trench coat over the car. "You're an angel, and you know me, you can read me; What do you think?"

"I'm, I'm not familiar, with, the appropriate, human…" He trailed off, unsure. Dean found his reaction amusing and smirked. He heard the angel shuffled again and knew he must be watching him from the low disapproving hum at the reaction.

"I believe in you, Cas,"

"I, Thank you,"

"Apart from the fact you're basically family anyway. But the whole personal space thing. Takes a bit of getting used to but," He was suddenly cut off by fiery lips covering his own; a fearsome heat spread through him and he felt Cas' hands rest just beneath his jacket. Dean returned the kiss with equal fervour. There was a jolt of what felt like electricity between them and Cas pulled away. Dean kept his eyes closed.

"Did you feel that?"

"Cas, you're all over me, of course I can feel you,"

"This may hurt,"

"Easy now Cas," but before he could finish the retort a ripple ecstasy flooded his head. "Is, is that, ah! You? Cas!"

"Will you please be quiet Dean? I'm thinking,"

"Make it worth my while," Dean challenged and was immediately not disappointed. He could feel a presence pressing on his mind and mentally pushed back.

Instantly his mind was flooded with brilliant white thoughts: "He's beautiful," "I want him," "Please never leave me," "Dean!" "Dean, please don't stop," "I want you,"

And over it all, "Dean, don't get lost in there. Come back to me," He could feel Cas reaching out for him and he reached back. The connected energies catapulted them back to reality and Dean opened his eyes for a moment only to see a mass of Cas' dark hair. Cas was breathing heavily and it took a moment before Dean realised he was too.

As their breathing slowed Cas began to push himself up for where he where he lay sprawled across Dean's torso. Dean took one last deep breath before Cas pulled away, and shut his eyes again to fake calm; to pretend his heart wasn't speeding; to pretend his brain wasn't buzzing from hearing hat he knew were Cas' thoughts.

"Dean, look at me," Dean refused.

"Do you know what just happened?" Cas said frantically.

"Are you telling me you don't?"

"Our bond just strengthened. You could hear my thoughts, couldn't you?"

"You," Dean said, reaching up and poking Cas in the chest, "Want me,"

He felt Cas lean in across him again.

"And you Dean Winchester," He said in a whisper at Dean's ear; a whisper that sent chills through him. "Want. Me,"

"Perhaps,"

"You can't lie to an angel," Cas said, trailing kisses down one side of Dean's neck and the light touch of his finders down the other side. "Certainly not to one with whom you are linked,"

"You sound so smug,"

"Open your eyes and you can see how smug I look,"

"If I saw it I'd have to wipe it off,"

"Try it hunter," Dean simply smiled. He could imagine Cas holding himself ever so still just above him; The perfect stand-off.

"You know if I keep my eyes shut I can just imagine you doing that all over again,"

"Open them and I will,"

"Promise?"

"An angel's word."


	2. (The long Awaited) Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Castiel reveals that he can break their bond. Dean believes that means that he wants to.

“No, no way Sammy. You get the crazy bathroom ghost. I tapped out when the perfumed soap tried to drown me. I’ve still got a migraine from the smell,”

“Big baby,” Sam muttered into the articles in front of him.  
“Hey! Show a little respect to your elders,” Dean hastily screwed up and threw a paper ball hitting Sam squarely between his shoulders.  
“It’s rare for you to show any respect to me,” Both brothers jumped but only slightly when Cas’ comment came unexpected from just behind Dean. Sam nodded in greeting and returned to figuring out the ghost’s item holding it to Earth.  
“I respect you!” Dean objected. He leant far enough back on his chair he could look up at Cas; albeit upside down, “I’m honest with you, it’s different,” 

Castiel raised an eyebrow to which Dean grinned before shooting a quick look Sam’s way. When he saw that Sam was still focussed on his work, he reached out a hand behind him, which Cas took in his own as he stepped forwards to take the seat next to Dean’s. A shiver trailed down his arm and spine from the contact and from the flutter of Cas’ eyes it affected him similarly.  
“You staying for lunch Cas?”  
“It sounded as though your hunt was going to take priority over lunch,”  
“Nah, Sammy can deal,”   
“Can I help at all?”  
“Just a normal ghost hunt,” Dean dropped his and Cas’ hands beneath the table as his brother spun his chair to face them and drop a stack of papers before them “unusual place, and not one of his finest moments,” Sam gestured towards his brother, “But I think I know what’s keeping her here. Her bracelet is in all her pictures, she never took it off, but it wasn’t on the body, in the room or on the girl who killed her. I think it fell down the drain of the shower and got stuck there,”  
“Would you like some help in retrieving it Sam?”  
“Yeah, thanks,”  
“Ugh fine, go send moaning Myrtle to the boring beyond,” Dean waved his hands dismissively.  
“You want me to grab anything while I’m out?” Sam asked as he shouldered his rucksack.  
“Yeah, pie from that shop, uh… whatsit avenue bakery,”  
“You’re gonna die young,”  
“Long as I go out fighting,”  
“Fighting Cholesterol,”  
“Bitch,”  
“Jerk,”  
Castiel stood to follow and as he passed rested his hand on Dean’s neck for just a moment; long enough for Dean to hear a message in the back of his mind.

I will look after him,

Dean didn’t have a chance to reply before their contact was lost but he watched until Castiel turned the corner, and then for the slam of the main door as they left. 

 

-

“All the drains, just plumes of fire and three guys run straight out of the guy’s bathroom screaming, and in nothing but towels. Must have been on one of the school teams because the girls mobbed them,”  
“And what? You sacrifice Cas to them instead?” Dean asked looking around and not seeing him follow Sam in.  
“We uh, forgot the pie, he said he’d grab some and be back,”  
“Huh, glad someone has a little respect for a man’s needs,” He said, settling himself back down.  
“Yeah, I’m sure it’s your baser needs he’s appealing to,”  
“What’s that supposed to mean?”  
“It means you’re not subtle, and I’m not blind,”  
“I don’t know what you mea-” Sam cut off his denial.  
“You were holding hands under the table before we left,” he glanced round the room pulling his favourite unimpressed expression, “And you’ve tidied up,”  
“So what? You got a problem?”  
“God no, are you kidding? Just thought you wouldn’t want to hide it anymore,”  
“Thanks man,”  
“Like I don’t want to know details or anything, but you don’t need to panic if I turn round and see you holding his hand,”  
“And if it’s not hand holding?”  
“I really don’t want to know,”  
“Pfft, like you wouldn’t get some angel ass if you could,”  
“I’ll pass, thanks,”  
“Whatever, tell him I’ll be in my room. Oh and nice work on the case Sammy,”

 

“I didn’t know which you would prefer; the woman in the store set aside her three most popular,”  
“You bought me three pies,”  
“Yes,”  
“Mmm, Love you man,”  
Dean grabbed the front of Castiel’s shirt and pulled him forwards into a kiss. Cas’ hands came up framing Dean’s face, cradling it even as he determinedly pulled away.   
“I haven’t been honest with you,”   
“And you pick now for your honesty,”  
“I’m trying to do the right thing,”  
“You get a girl pregnant?”  
“What? No!” Castiel pulled back sharply a look of panic at the accusation flashing across his face, “I have not had sexual intercourse with anyone-”  
“Easy Cas, you’ll bust a blood vessel.” Castiel frowned still annoyed at the accusation. Dean sat back giving him some space. “Okay, shoot,”  
“We can break the bond between us,”  
“What?”  
“I have recently been informed of a way to break the bond between us. There are angels who frown upon such a bond and the have given me a way of breaking it,”  
Dean steeled his expression.  
“I couldn’t keep such a possibility from you, I…I can show you if you want,”

-

 

“Sam, may I talk with you?”  
“Sure Cas, go ahead,”  
“I’m not sure where to start,”  
“If it’s about you and my brother I don’t mind,”  
“It is in part, and I value your acceptance of my feelings for him.”  
“But…”  
“I offered to break the bond between us; he left shortly after as you probably heard,”  
“Bond being what exactly, you asked to break up with him?”  
“A bond was established between us when I pulled him from Hell and reformed his body. It grew as our working relationship and friendship established itself. For some time now he has been able to call for me in a passing thought, hear my thoughts through physical contact too, among other things,”  
“Okay, whoa before I hear any more, uh, details. This bond you have, why’d you want to break it?”  
“The bond wasn’t a choice for him. You have all fought too hard for free will for you simply to be assigned a bond like that,”  
“So you asked him if he wanted to break the bond,”  
“I told him I had learnt of a way I could,”  
“And you don’t think maybe he took that the wrong way,”  
“I know he stormed out. I’m not stupid…”  
“Cut the crap Cas,” Castiel wrangled his hands together tightly but did not speak for a minute, unsure of what to say.  
“I screwed up didn’t I?”  
“Looks like it,”  
“How do I fix it?”  
“Just do what you usually do, and I never want to remember saying this but make him feel like he deserves a little bit a good, good like you,”  
“Am I good for him?”  
“Yeah Cas, You’re good for him,”

-

Cas had tried. And Dean warded his room against angels. Sam felt Cas was entirely justified in getting angry at him for that. But right now Sam was fed up of his brother grinding his teeth and finding things to keep himself busy with. Something had to change and Sam’s last plan of disrupting the angel warding in Dean’s room hadn’t encouraged Cas to again like he’d hoped.  
“You going to talk to Cas?” Sam prompted. It had been three weeks and Dean had been doing his utmost to avoid small talk like this  
“Nope,” He busied himself with the burgers he was making for them both.  
“He thinks you don’t want the bond; whatever the hell it actually is since you won’t talk to me about it,”  
“Damn it Sam he’s only been here because he’s felt he has to. He can walk away from this,”  
“If you believe he’s only here because of that you’re more stupid than you look,”  
“He’s felt this longer than I have, even if we didn’t know what it was. Why should he want that? He’s an angel Sam,”  
“Would you listen to yourself?”  
“I am listening, no-one else seems to be getting it. If he didn’t want the bond then he can go ahead and break it. Call do-over. Call time out and go back to Heaven and not set foot on this god-forsaken planet again,”  
“Dean,”  
“No Sam, that’s enough,”  
“Fine, but I know your bad mistakes, and this is the worst mistake of your life,”

Dean kicked his heels back on the bed and leaned back, settling himself down into the pillows. He was sufficiently buzzed as he turned the music up loud on his IPod until his ears hurt and he couldn’t hear anything, let alone his heartbeat which had been pounding in his ears for days every time he was alone. It was exhausting to keep mindful of everything except Cas’ name in case he accidentally called him; a confession over angel radio that would serve only to oblige the angel to come back, to act on a bond, an impulse that he didn’t deserve. 

A soft touch skirted over his wrist before thoughts itched at the back of his mind.  
I don’t deserve anything so precious; to have you as mine. Please believe me. Please forgive me.  
The words echoed around Dean’s thoughts, unleashing a mental tidal wave of self loathing, and undeserving thoughts. The words whispered their way past every barrier until before Dean realised it he was curled in on himself shaking through convulsions and heaving frantic sobs. He soon blacked out, alone, curled up like a scared child.

 

The bunker was too quiet when he came to. His throat was dry and sore and his muscles ached as if from being tensed for too long. Not even the rumbling of the heating in the walls was humming away in the background. The supposed calm hit a nerve and Dean readied himself in anticipation of trouble. He stumbled forwards knife in hand and slowly opened the door. He stilled when just outside of the door was Cas, hunched over and asleep in a chair. His appearance was dishevelled; coat dropped in a pile next to him and clothes messy looking as if they’d been worn on a human for at least a week and his hair looked flat with grease. He looked more pathetically human than Dean had seen him before. 

Dean dropped down to a crouch beside him dropped the knife to the floor and reached up to cup Cas’ cheek.   
“Hey man, you don’t look so good,” He said as Castiel blinked back to consciousness.   
“I don’t feel so good,”  
“Wha’did you do?”  
“I’m surprised it’s not obvious,” Dean waited for him to continue as Cas shifted and Dean felt him lean in briefly to his touch and then just as soon he pulled away completely, “I screwed up. Again,” Dean huffed out a laugh.  
“We don’t keep track in this family,” He told him waving him to stand.  
“I am still…family?” Castiel wobbled and Dean’s hands shot out to steady him. Once he’s gathered enough balance he step back out of Dean’s grasp. Twice. Dean half-heartedly wondered if Cas avoided his touch for a third time if it everything between them would be over for good.   
Dean didn’t reply to the question. He couldn’t take the chance. Instead he pulled Cas in as tightly as he could, burying his face in Cas’ neck. He felt Cas hesitate for a moment before returning the gesture locking them together. His stomach was churning and he would be shaking if he wasn’t holding on so tightly  
“Cas, I’m sorry you got lumped with me in this bond, and I’m an idiot I know, a stupid dumb human and if you want to get rid of this bond you do it,”  
“Do you want it Dean?”  
“I’m a fucking mess,”   
“I am little better…but do you want to be connected to me?” Dean was silent and after some time Cas let out a heavy sigh. “I understand,”  
“No you don’t,”… “Come on, let me help get you cleaned up,” Dean pulled away from him and led him through the bathroom.

Slowly and reverently Dean stripped Cas of his rumpled and dirty clothes and Castiel let him. He turned on the water. Shrugged his own clothes without much thought and pushed his angel in under the warm water. He reached for his shower wash and squeezed some into his hands and rubbed them until they were soapy. They slowly, without meeting Cas’s eyes he began to wash away at the dirt and the scratches of blood whose marks littered Cas’s skin. He started at the collar bone running his finders over it and letting his thumb follow the dip of his shoulder. He kept his eyes strictly on where his hands led him. Up through Castiel’s hair and down along the back of his neck and his back. Washing each mark away gently, reaching for some more body wash, gently tracing the lines of his abdomen and down over his hips. He daren’t look up.

The shower wasn’t big enough with them both in there for him to crouch down the reach any lower and so his hand stayed resting as Castiel’s hips. As the water started to run cold. He reached around Cas when he felt the angel shiver under his touch and yanked a towel from the rack hooking it around Cas before getting one for himself and tying it at his waist. He gently rubbed and patted away the water that covered Castiel’s skin and then knelt on the bathroom mat to dry down to his legs and feet before working his way back up over his bottom his back and then gently towel drying his hair. In the back of his mind his was sure that the moment one of them broke the silence he’d suddenly wake up and nothing would have changed. They’d be separated by heaven and earth. He didn’t spare much time on his own drying before throwing both towels down in a pile on the floor and hooking his hand into Cas’ and pulling him back to the bedroom.   
Dean had known exactly what Sam had done to sabotage the extra wards he’s put up but Dean had never been as grateful of Sam’s interference as he pulled Castiel down towards the bed. Having him so close again was a gift he couldn’t afford to lose.

They lay facing each other, their hands remained entangled  
“Dean,” He eyes shot up immediately. “I’m sorry,”  
“Don’t,” He hated himself the moment he felt a tear slip from his eye and track its way down his cheek.   
“I love you Dean Winchester,”  
“Don’t say that ‘cause you’re obligated. The bond-,”  
“The angels, they cornered me, caught me off guard and cast the spell regardless of my choice. There is nothing between us anymore. I’m sorry Dean. I had to come back to you. Not knowing you were okay was,”  
“I liked being connected to you Cas,”  
“You wanted the bond?” Castiel asked, so quietly Dean almost missed it.  
“Still here with me aren’t you? He said hooking his arms over Cas’ waist

Dean leant over kissing the apology right out of his mouth “Screw their spell,” He heard Cas gasp “You were gone too long,”   
“I missed you,” and then it was Dean’s turn to gasp as a ripple of pain and lightening scorched through his mind. He heard Cas shushing him gently rubbing small circles about his temples.  
Love you Cas. The thought so clearly in the front of his mind it could have been written across his forehead.  
I love you too, Came the reply in his mind. A shuddering breath escaped him as he curled in closer around Cas repeating the though as a mantra.


End file.
